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Bottling up emotions


Naamah D.

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I really need to vent right now. I tend to plan things out a bit too much. I've decided to take up being a florist instead of working with kids. The main reasons I'm not working with kids is my panic attacks in classrooms. Remember my post on screen free week? I talked to another educator and she said that it's not mandatory so if I do have to work with kids, I don't have to do it.

 

Video games are a major coping skill with me. I require visual and auditory stimulation as well as doing stuff with my hands. If I can do those three things at the same time, then I'm happy. I don't go outside because I'm intolerant to heat. If it's over 68 to 70 degrees out I can't be outside.

 

Basically, I'm stressed out when I know I shouldn't be. I should focus on college first and not finding a job first. Isn't the purpose of college to find what you want to do?

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I empathize with your stress, but I would like to hear more context about your situation so I can provide specific advice. This is the first time I am reading about your troubles. For me, hearing about others' life challenges and their solutions helps me put my own problems into scale, which makes me feel in control of my life and eliminates all of my long-term stress. Regardless, I hope that you find yourself in a position one day where you are happy enough to never have to bottle up your emotions.

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                   It may be a stupid suggestion but... why don't you change the place you life for one less warm for you?. About college, I disagree, I think you go to collage to have a degree in what you like so you can have a job in that later, but you should know first what you want... specially because go to collage is a lot of money, and it would be a waste if in the middle of it you decided that's not for you and quit, or stay because you don't want that money you already invested be for nothing... in wich case you would be wasting time, because your doing something you don't like and/or love instead of looking for what you really want. But that is just my opinion.

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I live in New England so its finally getting cold enough for me. It has been raining a lot though.

 

Video games are a huge coping skill. Right now I'm in a lot of pain because of "womanly" things and games are distracting me from that. I don't know if you saw my thread or not, but here it is:

 

http://www.tdnforums.com/index.php?/topic/41956-not-beating-video-games/?hl=%2Bbeating+%2Bvideo+%2Bgames

 

I've gotten "silence casual" a lot. I thought that casual gamers didn't spend tons of money over the years on video games and play as much as I do. I take breaks during the day, but that's just being healthy.

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Your family member who talks down to you probably has self-esteem issues, the severity of which is directly correlated to how aggressively he insults you. It sounds possible that he is joking with you, but in that case, he would have failed to communicate his benign intentions. I do not mean to put down your relative, but his actions suggest to me that he lacks some virtues. Take heart that you shouldn't change for someone else's weakness, do so to better your own life.

 

You should think of college as an investment; you pay an institution to receive an education that benefits you more than the money and time you spent would have. While worrying about what you want to do is a noble cause, keep in mind that you also have to consider your finances and the fact that you won't have enough time to explore every subject. What different classes and subjects are like is already set in stone, but your attitude towards them along with how much you end up liking them can change for the better. High grades can bring you to enjoy your classes, so hopefully, you can develop an interest in a major that addresses your financial needs as well.

 

I still don't get what you mean when you say "womanly things and games are distracting you from video games". Are you struggling between your desires and the expectations of others or are you concerned with something else?

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It may be a stupid suggestion but... why don't you change the place you life for one less warm for you?. About college, I disagree, I think you go to collage to have a degree in what you like so you can have a job in that later, but you should know first what you want... specially because go to collage is a lot of money, and it would be a waste if in the middle of it you decided that's not for you and quit, or stay because you don't want that money you already invested be for nothing... in wich case you would be wasting time, because your doing something you don't like and/or love instead of looking for what you really want. But that is just my opinion.

 

I really need to vent right now. I tend to plan things out a bit too much. I've decided to take up being a florist instead of working with kids. The main reasons I'm not working with kids is my panic attacks in classrooms. Remember my post on screen free week? I talked to another educator and she said that it's not mandatory so if I do have to work with kids, I don't have to do it.

 

Video games are a major coping skill with me. I require visual and auditory stimulation as well as doing stuff with my hands. If I can do those three things at the same time, then I'm happy. I don't go outside because I'm intolerant to heat. If it's over 68 to 70 degrees out I can't be outside.

 

Basically, I'm stressed out when I know I shouldn't be. I should focus on college first and not finding a job first. Isn't the purpose of college to find what you want to do?

See post below

 

It may be a stupid suggestion but... why don't you change the place you life for one less warm for you?. About college, I disagree, I think you go to collage to have a degree in what you like so you can have a job in that later, but you should know first what you want... specially because go to collage is a lot of money, and it would be a waste if in the middle of it you decided that's not for you and quit, or stay because you don't want that money you already invested be for nothing... in wich case you would be wasting time, because your doing something you don't like and/or love instead of looking for what you really want. But that is just my opinion.

This is exactly what I was going to say. To the original poster, PLEASE take it from someone who knows. I have already gone that route. I wasn't going to college to find out WHAT I wanted to do, I was going because I THOUGHT I knew what I wanted to do. I went to a very expensive college at that because I didn't know any better, and had nobody to guide me. I am the first person in my family to get a college degree. Now, I am paying off lots of student loan debt for a degree I am not even using. Then I ended going back to my first love, nursing, after working for years as a nurse's aid. Maybe you need to explore your options in the work force for a few years, see what it is that you LOVE to do. Then pursue that in college so that you can do it at the highest level.

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