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Nay for my family unable to stay healty


Marae19

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So, a couple of years ago, my aunt (my dad's sister) got diagnosed with MS. Initally walking just got a little harder, she'd use a assistive cane, then she got degraded to a walker, and now for the last two years she's been a wheelchair. Things would slowly go better, she'd be able to walk, but then she'd slip and break her hip. She then got a prothesis, which got infected, and she got a second one. Unfortunally, the infection didn't dissapear with the removal of the first prothesis, so she's been in incredible pain 24/7 for the last year. Then in the beginning of last January, the doctors decided the second prothesis should be removed, too, and no new one would go in it's place. The surgery went well, she's currently in revalidation, and it's going incredibly great, to everybody's surprise (she'll be discharged from the revalidation centre a month early). So, everyone was glad, because after years of pain it was gone. Sure, her right leg is 10 cm shorter than her left leg, but she can walk again, and it doesn't hurt anyore.

But two days after I heard that everything was so great, I got a text from my mom that said that her mother (my grandmother) got a lump in her hissi, and it turned out it's cancer. It's most likely spread already through a big part of her body, and treatment will start in about three weeks.

So, at the same time I'm really happy that things are finally looking up for my aunt, who genuinly deserves that after so many years of pain and everything, but I'm also really sad that my grandmother has suddenly got cancer, and that we've discovered it this late. And feeling those two things at the same time can get really confusing.

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I'm sorry to hear about your grandma, but glad things are going well for your aunt. My aunt also had MS and it was difficult to watch her go through that. A lot of autoimmune diseases seem to pop up in my family; unfortunately many of these illnesses just happen and there's not much (if anything) anyone have done to prevent them. It sounds like you are close to your family, which I hope you can find comfort in. Even if it means you have to share in greater sadness when times get rough, you have seen the other side too - it feels really great when things start looking up. :) Wishing your grandma good luck in her treatments!

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cancer runs in my family, and other problems. as a kid growing up, it just breaks my heart to see the gray hairs and health problems persist and get worse in my mom and dad, both of whom have had surgery in the last few years. i know life doesnt last forever, but it's gonna kill me when i lose a parent (i've only lost 1 grandparent, and that was when i was a little little kid and didnt really know him).

 

glad your aunt is doing better, sorry about your grandma! i know how it feels to be both happy and sad athe same time.

Oh, I hope everything will go fine with your parents. I've only lost my grandpa when I was seven, one of the only things I remember about him was that he loved his garden, so I know the feeling.

I'm sorry to hear about your grandma, but glad things are going well for your aunt. My aunt also had MS and it was difficult to watch her go through that. A lot of autoimmune diseases seem to pop up in my family; unfortunately many of these illnesses just happen and there's not much (if anything) anyone have done to prevent them. It sounds like you are close to your family, which I hope you can find comfort in. Even if it means you have to share in greater sadness when times get rough, you have seen the other side too - it feels really great when things start looking up. :) Wishing your grandma good luck in her treatments!

Yeah, it sucks seeing someone you care about not being able to do things for themselves anymore, and I'm glad she can do that again. We are a close family, even though my parents are divorced, I'm close to both sides (except my maternal grandpa, but he is not really interested in his grandchildren, and usually rather rude to everybody). Thanks for the wellwishes :)

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I'm so sorry to hear it. Everything you are feeling is normal. In humans, bad things are always more paramount than the good. It's natural. Obviously it's great to hear that one issue is resolved with your Aunt. But awful to hear about your Grandma. You have my deepest sympathies.

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I'm so sorry to hear it. Everything you are feeling is normal. In humans, bad things are always more paramount than the good. It's natural. Obviously it's great to hear that one issue is resolved with your Aunt. But awful to hear about your Grandma. You have my deepest sympathies.

Thank you, and yeah, I'm ecstatic that my aunt is finally doing better, but it just sucks that suddenly it's my grandma who is ill. My mom celebrated her birthday today, and my grandma seemed to be doing fine, she luckily isn't stressing about it too much, but that's also because she's had cancer before, and survived that. But I'm still hoping for the best :)

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its always healthy to hope for the best, but prepare for the worst, thats how i handle most any situation.. sometimes there is a sigh of relief, but sometimes not:(

Yeah, I know. I still hope she'll make it through, and can live another 10 years like she wants to, and if it weren't for the cancer I'd see her do it as well (she's 80, but she still works and lives on her own without anyone needing to take care of her), but I know there's a big chance she won't survive this. I guess there's nothing else for me to do than wait.

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Be brave :) Grandma's can be tough old ladies, my nan's had bowel cancer 3 times, the last time she was in such a bad way that the hospital told us to get the family together to say our goodbyes to her, the anaesthetist's words to us were, "prepare for the worst, but hope for the best", he said she had a 1 in a 100 chance of survival, but she did...I'm glad your aunt's doing better, I have MS so it affects me on a more personal level when I hear about other sufferers.

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Be brave :) Grandma's can be tough old ladies, my nan's had bowel cancer 3 times, the last time she was in such a bad way that the hospital told us to get the family together to say our goodbyes to her, the anaesthetist's words to us were, "prepare for the worst, but hope for the best", he said she had a 1 in a 100 chance of survival, but she did...I'm glad your aunt's doing better, I have MS so it affects me on a more personal level when I hear about other sufferers.

Wow, that's amazing with your grandma! I hope it will end the same with mine. You have my sympathies, seeing what MS has turned my aunt (one of the strongest people I know) into, I would never wish it upon anyone, and I'm truly sorry to hear that you suffer from it as well. I hope you're doing allright given the circumstances :)

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Thanks :) Doing alright given the circumstances pretty much covers it really, yeah >< Just got to try and deal with these curveballs that life throws us as best as we can, haven't we? The best of luck for your nan pulling through and carrying on with living a good life, your aunt too!

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Thanks :) Doing alright given the circumstances pretty much covers it really, yeah >< Just got to try and deal with these curveballs that life throws us as best as we can, haven't we? The best of luck for your nan pulling through and carrying on with living a good life, your aunt too!

I'm glad you're doing alright, and I'm sure you'll do better at some point :)

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I'm hopeful for that :) I start a new treatment next month (as the one I was on wasn't working at all) if this one actually slows my relapse rate down and gives me a chance to recover a bit, I'll be able to be more positive :yes:

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I can relate to this so much. My grandma is battling cancer round 2 and it would be going okay if she didn't also have a sudden heart problem. They can't treat her heart until the cancer is gone, but they can't give her the full cancer treatment until her heart is stronger. She has insisted on getting the full cancer treatment anyway. I'm trying to stay positive but it's really hard. I know she's strong in spirit, and I hope that will get her through this. We're going to visit her in 2 weeks if she makes it that far. Probably the hardest part for me is that my grandma and I never had a very strong relationship and now that I'm faced with all this I've started to feel guilty even though I know it's not really my fault (she's always had favorites, and it wasn't me). I just want to make things right between us before she's gone and I don't really know where to start.

 

That said, it's encouraging to read about what you all have been through and how strong it has made you. I will keep you all in my thoughts.

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If your nan does ok and you do get to go and see her, don't over-think things with regard to your past relationship, ok? Bear this one very important thing in mind, it is your past relationship with her. Look to the future and forging a positive friendship with her now, don't be bogged down by the past, it only holds us back. Best of luck to you :)

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I'm hopeful for that :) I start a new treatment next month (as the one I was on wasn't working at all) if this one actually slows my relapse rate down and gives me a chance to recover a bit, I'll be able to be more positive :yes:

Best of luck with that! I really hope it'll work out this time :)

 

I can relate to this so much. My grandma is battling cancer round 2 and it would be going okay if she didn't also have a sudden heart problem. They can't treat her heart until the cancer is gone, but they can't give her the full cancer treatment until her heart is stronger. She has insisted on getting the full cancer treatment anyway. I'm trying to stay positive but it's really hard. I know she's strong in spirit, and I hope that will get her through this. We're going to visit her in 2 weeks if she makes it that far. Probably the hardest part for me is that my grandma and I never had a very strong relationship and now that I'm faced with all this I've started to feel guilty even though I know it's not really my fault (she's always had favorites, and it wasn't me). I just want to make things right between us before she's gone and I don't really know where to start.

 

That said, it's encouraging to read about what you all have been through and how strong it has made you. I will keep you all in my thoughts.

Oh, good luck! It's really too bad that the doctors don't really want to treat either the way it should because of the other problem. I recognise the way your grandma's point here, because my grandma has said a similar thing. Her doctors don't really want to amputate the whole hissi until they're sure it's really nessecary, and my grandma just really wants it gone, so she actually wants to amputate it initially, before she goes through treatments that they aren't sure about if they'll actually work.

And as for the relationship you have with her, good luck. And I agree with what jellysundae said, don't be held down by the relationship you've had with her up until now, but focus on the one you can have in the future, because these horrible things bring people togheter. Good luck :D

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Thank you Mara :D

 

 

re: Been Blessed's Grandma - I guess this is why it's best that the doctors have the decision on what gets done. It's got to be impossible to be able to be objective about something that's affecting you personally. Though I can't imagine how frustrating it must be for the doctors to be in a situation where 2 problems and their treatments are conflicting in that way : / Hopefully, as medicine progresses, there'll be less and less of this kind of thing happening.

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