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Heartbroken. Is there really no hope??


nondenominator

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I don't even have the energy to flesh this story out as much as I want to, the shortened version is after rejoined and working on my account for 2 years I've been perma silenced. It really bums me out as I'll never be able to reconnect with the friendships I've made. I made a mention of participating in Inktober this year, and that I made my own prompt list for this year that my friend was interested in seeing. Without even offering up specifics I just said I wouldn't know how to get you to the list unless its through email and I guess that set the trigger off.
I had a warning on my account previous for slipping up and using lmao.

My question is, honestly am I crazy here? To think these rules are kinda,,,,really ridiculous? I refreshed myself after the fact on the rules and I Get It, but I feel like sitewise they aren't taken into consideration that there are older people here. It feels cruel to me that we are given access to socializing yet are punished over wanting to have a lasting friendship.

TLDR I've lost contact with a really good friend because a site wants to treat us all like infants :3c and thats all ok apparently. Sighs I'm just beyond frustrated.

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1 hour ago, acorah said:

No, you`re not bonkers. Or I`m bonkers too! I`m reading it as your crime was to write the word "email" ?

I guess so. I think there might be an auto monitoring system set in place. Certain words are triggered and thus you get warned/silenced or banned that way.
It's just really frustrating, all I wanted to do was share a prompt list so the friend and I could do inktober together....lmao I'm like just so sad about this. Nothing I can do either.

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Maybe you could have someone here contact the friend for you? Do any of your Neofriends belong on this forum? Basically someone could send a message to them, telling them to join this forum and directing them to this thread. Then you two could figure out further contact through PMs here.

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5 minutes ago, lakecat said:

Maybe you could have someone here contact the friend for you? Do any of your Neofriends belong on this forum?

I'm not sure and I appreciate the offer, but I'm paranoid sending a message on my behalf would get you guys in trouble and I don't want that. I wish there was a loop hole so I could just get them my email somehow so they could just  message me there. Otherwise I literally won't be able to talk to them, unless I make several accounts to keep the most basic vague conversations not to get silenced again lol,,,,,,,,,,,,,,

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10 hours ago, lakecat said:

Maybe you could have someone here contact the friend for you? Do any of your Neofriends belong on this forum? Basically someone could send a message to them, telling them to join this forum and directing them to this thread. Then you two could figure out further contact through PMs here.

I just thought of that - I`ll neomail your friend if you want

 

 

10 hours ago, acorah said:

I just thought of that - I`ll neomail your friend if you want

 

Our posts seem to have crossed. You`re still welcome though.

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5 minutes ago, acorah said:

I just thought of that - I`ll neomail your friend if you want

 

I feel like mentioning this site would be considering Luring cos thats my offense lol
I'm just a creep trying to lure you all off of neopets and into my van 
Good gracious.
I really dont want people get silenced over me :/ 
If I knew it could work Id try but I feel like its just gonna be a ton of effort for nothing and I'm already deeply saddened. Idk if I wanna bother getting my hopes up.

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To N.D.: do you know for sure they aren't already a member here or another Neo forum? Maybe you could search for their Neo username here to see. Then send PMs if they are here. I think TDN is an approved forum, so don't over worry about referring to it. I mention TDN in Neomails sometimes.

I'm guessing a moderator will reply when they see this and offer some suggestions. Or you could PM them yourself.

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5 minutes ago, lakecat said:

To N.D.: do you know for sure they aren't already a member here or another Neo forum? Maybe you could search for their Neo username here to see. Then send PMs if they are here. I think TDN is an approved forum, so don't over worry about referring to it. I mention TDN in Neomails sometimes.

I searched their username right after signup here lol, came up dry. It's just you have to be so careful with your wording. If they mention their username there or say anything along those lines the message might not even reach them.

Thats what happened when we were talking about inktober, they got a notfi but not the neomail and I was silenced for 24 hours and after attempting to repeal the silence I was perma silenced :3c

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Well, I think your "offense" was trying to find personal information - email address.  TDN is an official neopets help site, and is allowed to be mentioned.  So, I think it would be OK for someone to say to your friend that these boards exist and they might find friends here.....

It would be better if it came from someone that they had contact with already though, so that it wasn't just coming out of the blue.

Wait, it was a temp silence and then when you tried to plead your case to TNT they made it permanent?  That is not cool.

It's been like this for most of Neopia, though Adam and Donna actually intended for the site to be for college aged kids with adult humor.  But, at the time virtual pets were super popular, and cute faeries and stuff, so they attracted kids, and then they had to child proof the site.

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10 hours ago, acorah said:

Why on earth are they so paranoid? Has it always been like this?

 

From my understanding, via the back and forth I had between the person addressing my ticket, they are bent on keeping the site Family Friendly and its a serious offense to "lure offsite" 

 

10 hours ago, balloongal247 said:

Well, I think your "offense" was trying to find personal information - email address.  TDN is an official neopets help site, and is allowed to be mentioned.  So, I think it would be OK for someone to say to your friend that these boards exist and they might find friends here.....

It would be better if it came from someone that they had contact with already though, so that it wasn't just coming out of the blue.

Wait, it was a temp silence and then when you tried to plead your case to TNT they made it permanent?  That is not cool.

It's been like this for most of Neopia, though Adam and Donna actually intended for the site to be for college aged kids with adult humor.  But, at the time virtual pets were super popular, and cute faeries and stuff, so they attracted kids, and then they had to child proof the site.

I didn't even out right ask for an email, I was just saying that I prob cant even ask for your email and that must have triggered the 24 hour silence.
Sighs. I knew them and talked with them for a while, cant exactly clock how long and we mostly just talked about neopets and art so I don't know any like Mutual friend who could carry the message.

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47 minutes ago, lakecat said:

To N.D.: do you know for sure they aren't already a member here or another Neo forum? Maybe you could search for their Neo username here to see. Then send PMs if they are here. I think TDN is an approved forum, so don't over worry about referring to it. I mention TDN in Neomails sometimes.

For the record, TDN as in thedailyneopets.com is an approved fan-site that can be mentioned on Neo. But the forums as in tdnforums.com is not an approved site and cannot be mentioned on Neo. (That said, I've definitely talked about "TDN forums" on the boards before with no consequences. It's probably safe as long as you're not trying to use a direct link to the forums, but try it at your own risk.)

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10 minutes ago, kayahtik said:

For the record, TDN as in thedailyneopets.com is an approved fan-site that can be mentioned on Neo. But the forums as in tdnforums.com is not an approved site and cannot be mentioned on Neo. (That said, I've definitely talked about "TDN forums" on the boards before with no consequences. It's probably safe as long as you're not trying to use a direct link to the forums, but try it at your own risk.)

yeaa see its like "are you on TDN" might read to them as luring?
idk how it works

is there like 10 people mercilessly reading through all our neomails? or is there a bot that auto marks trigger words.
theres no way to get it done without doing some kinda code and idk that might pick up as well

lmao im just really exhausted with this entire thing rn

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2 hours ago, nondenominator said:

is there like 10 people mercilessly reading through all our neomails? or is there a bot that auto marks trigger words.
theres no way to get it done without doing some kinda code and idk that might pick up as well

Just curious, did the message that caused this actually get sent? Or did you get one of those 'you're not allowed to use bad language in NeoMail' messages?

I'm pretty sure certain words/combinations of words trigger the above warning (figuring out what you did wrong is always a fun game - these days I make sure to copy/paste the message before clicking 'send', because the back button Neopets provides never seems to work for me). Perhaps it's the same for messages mentioning email/luring/whatever, although I'm guessing someone would take a closer look at those kinds of messages to check if whatever set off the trigger was actually relevant. But I highly doubt they have the capacity to monitor our messages closely.

What happened when you tried to repeal your silencing though? How did that end up getting you perma silenced?

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TDN is an approved site and I mention it in my neomails ALL the time.  The way I go about it is by saying to the person, "Do you have an account with TDN (The Daily Neopets?)  You should go over and check it out.  I have an account over there, it is pretty cool."  Then I would proceed to tell them that they have links to the dailies, articles, help pages, forums, game guides, etc.  I have NEVER been silenced for it.  I have been silenced in the past for the EXACT  same offenses as the OP.  For mentioning email and for saying LMAO.  But never perma silenced.  I am very sorry to hear that.  

Your friend may very well be here.  Just because you aren't finding the Neopets username doesn't mean anything.  You won't find mine either and I am here.  lol

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6 hours ago, Nielo said:

Just curious, did the message that caused this actually get sent? Or did you get one of those 'you're not allowed to use bad language in NeoMail' messages?

I'm pretty sure certain words/combinations of words trigger the above warning (figuring out what you did wrong is always a fun game - these days I make sure to copy/paste the message before clicking 'send', because the back button Neopets provides never seems to work for me). Perhaps it's the same for messages mentioning email/luring/whatever, although I'm guessing someone would take a closer look at those kinds of messages to check if whatever set off the trigger was actually relevant. But I highly doubt they have the capacity to monitor our messages closely.

What happened when you tried to repeal your silencing though? How did that end up getting you perma silenced?

The prior warning on my account was cos of slipping up and saying lmao, then I mentioned email but never said what the email was or even asked for theirs. I was silenced for 24 hours, contacted to say I wasn't luring and that I just wanted to have my friend to do inktober with me and I feel I was wrongly punished. So then I assumed mentioning would get me in trouble so I didnt. Following day friend says they got the notification but no message. so I said something along the lines of the message got gobbled up maybe. So I was kinda like well I guess I'm doomed to only ever talk to them on this site since I can't say the word email let along share with then my email. Now I'm perma silenced. I don't even care why what when or how. I just feel like they really need to evaluate their rules and reasonings cos I don't feel like I didn't anything wrong. Are they that afraid people will leave and stop pouring money into their site to the point they punish people for showing the slightest sign of migration.

Idk, the guise of keeping it Family Friendly seems like a lie. We are both adults. What's the harm in sharing a Google doc and emailing art to show each other. This is beyond ridiculous to me.

 

1 hour ago, rntracy1 said:

TDN is an approved site and I mention it in my neomails ALL the time.  The way I go about it is by saying to the person, "Do you have an account with TDN (The Daily Neopets?)  You should go over and check it out.  I have an account over there, it is pretty cool."  Then I would proceed to tell them that they have links to the dailies, articles, help pages, forums, game guides, etc.  I have NEVER been silenced for it.  I have been silenced in the past for the EXACT  same offenses as the OP.  For mentioning email and for saying LMAO.  But never perma silenced.  I am very sorry to hear that.  

Your friend may very well be here.  Just because you aren't finding the Neopets username doesn't mean anything.  You won't find mine either and I am here.  lol

That may be a loophole option then, the real question is how do I go about contacting them. I'm almost afraid that it won't work, or somehow that account will get restricted. I just kinda want to build a tunnel so we can all crawl out into and are able to talk freely without getting punished.

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50 minutes ago, nondenominator said:

That may be a loophole option then, the real question is how do I go about contacting them. I'm almost afraid that it won't work, or somehow that account will get restricted. I just kinda want to build a tunnel so we can all crawl out into and are able to talk freely without getting punished.

I'll start digging with you, tbh.... I've had to stop myself from saying a lot of basic conversational things about the outside world on boards or in neomails, and I'm always afraid that one day I won't catch something and get banned over something like telling someone my ships in a fandom, or accidentally mentioning being part of the LGBT community (which btw, thanks neopets for recreating the feeling of being 'in the closet' for those of us who aren't! :arrowhead:) I understand why the rules exist, but I wish they were addressed more on a case-by-case basis.

I'm sorry you've lost contact with your friend! Could you contact them from a side account?
I haven't looked at the rules super recently, so I'd read through and check first but I would say something like: "Hey, this is Y/N. I messed up what I was trying to say to you about Inktober earlier, and I can't send neomail from my main now. If you want to, you can message me about it at example (at) g/mail (dot) com"

I know neopets blocks anything that looks like a link, which is why people type out "(dot)", and someone mentioned that you shouldn't say "Google" or something in a neomail, so I'd put a space or slash somewhere in between obvious words like gmail or hotmail.
Also I know in the Neopian Times you aren't supposed to mention being silenced or frozen, so I'd avoid mentioning that directly, just in case. 

But I don't think they can penalize you for giving out your own information? (Double check this before acting, obvs!)

If that's no good, you might be able to send them a link to a prompts page using the same "example[.]com/post" style of typing it out? (Though I'd "ce/n sor" site names like tumblr or reddit too)

Anyways, I hope you can reconnect with your friend!

@ TDN mods, I hope filter-dodging for benign reasons is okay to talk about here. Typing this post made me honestly even more paranoid about neo rules, but I've seen these workarounds used before with no ill effects.

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1 hour ago, kirschteins said:

I'll start digging with you, tbh.... I've had to stop myself from saying a lot of basic conversational things about the outside world on boards or in neomails, and I'm always afraid that one day I won't catch something and get banned over something like telling someone my ships in a fandom, or accidentally mentioning being part of the LGBT community (which btw, thanks neopets for recreating the feeling of being 'in the closet' for those of us who aren't! :arrowhead:) I understand why the rules exist, but I wish they were addressed more on a case-by-case basis.

I'm sorry you've lost contact with your friend! Could you contact them from a side account?
I haven't looked at the rules super recently, so I'd read through and check first but I would say something like: "Hey, this is Y/N. I messed up what I was trying to say to you about Inktober earlier, and I can't send neomail from my main now. If you want to, you can message me about it at example (at) g/mail (dot) com"

I know neopets blocks anything that looks like a link, which is why people type out "(dot)", and someone mentioned that you shouldn't say "Google" or something in a neomail, so I'd put a space or slash somewhere in between obvious words like gmail or hotmail.
Also I know in the Neopian Times you aren't supposed to mention being silenced or frozen, so I'd avoid mentioning that directly, just in case. 

But I don't think they can penalize you for giving out your own information? (Double check this before acting, obvs!)

If that's no good, you might be able to send them a link to a prompts page using the same "example[.]com/post" style of typing it out? (Though I'd "ce/n sor" site names like tumblr or reddit too)

Anyways, I hope you can reconnect with your friend!

@ TDN mods, I hope filter-dodging for benign reasons is okay to talk about here. Typing this post made me honestly even more paranoid about neo rules, but I've seen these workarounds used before with no ill effects.

Purposefully typing username(dot)com is a punishable offense on Neopets and I strongly advise AGAINST it!!

Doing this to simply get around the filters for these reasons is not allowed. Another thing, they can punish you with a silence or account freeze for sharing personal information, even if it is yours to share. Just because others are doing it, doesn't mean it's a good idea. As with anything proceed at your own risk.

You all need to remember this is a CHILDRENS site and therefore children cannot be allowed to share thier location and contact info for obvious reasons. There are far too many creeps out there! Neopets Team is being harsh like this to keep EVERYONE safe. If they were taken on a case-by-case basis then they might as well just ditch the rules.

I'm sorry you were silenced, but if you have a side account you can chat from that account, just don't break the rules again on that account.

 

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4 hours ago, Mouseykins said:

Purposefully typing username(dot)com is a punishable offense on Neopets and I strongly advise AGAINST it!!

Doing this to simply get around the filters for these reasons is not allowed. Another thing, they can punish you with a silence or account freeze for sharing personal information, even if it is yours to share. Just because others are doing it, doesn't mean it's a good idea. As with anything proceed at your own risk.

You all need to remember this is a CHILDRENS site and therefore children cannot be allowed to share thier location and contact info for obvious reasons. There are far too many creeps out there! Neopets Team is being harsh like this to keep EVERYONE safe. If they were taken on a case-by-case basis then they might as well just ditch the rules.

I'm sorry you were silenced, but if you have a side account you can chat from that account, just don't break the rules again on that account.

 

I'm aware its a children's site. I never forgot that, but I feel like adults on the site shouldnt have to be treated like children. Like it wouldn't be difficult to put barriers in place where sign up age groups could only mingle amongst other people in their age group and an age verification for 18+

I truly understand them wanting to keep people safe but in the same breath damning adults who use their site and actually make friends you have to only ever talk the them here and it seems really not fair to me.

 

TLDR its 2017 making 18+ areas so young adult/adult users can not be punished over such minor infractions.  

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